Okay, this blog is for all the mom's to read as they know the truth about parenting and just let everyone else believe they're perfect. You know how you want to tell everyone to take a flying leap when they tell you how "great" of a super mom you are? Well this would be that day!
I'm sitting her at 5:04 in the afternoon writing this blog. No, dinner isn't ready. Do I have it even planned? Sorta. I'm hoping to call
Milenko after I type this and tell him to pick something up from a fast food place or I'll order pizza. I tend to do this often since I'm just to tired, frustrated, busy and lazy to make a real dinner. Oh yeah, that would explain the size of my hips and my hubby's belly.
I've sent Bella to her room for a time-out until Daddy comes home. She was using the
DVD's as ice skates on the hardwood floors. That's always a fun one. She's been there since around 4:15 and I don't expect her to come out for another 1/2 hour or so. When
Milenko comes in the door she'll run downstairs to tell him that she was bad and wait for him to say "
tisk tisk" and then cuddle up to her and act as if nothing happened. I'm the bad guy and Daddy's the knight in shining armor.
My voice is currently raw from yelling at Lauren for ripping Bella's homework in 1/2 and then ripping all the Christmas cards off the closet door. On top of that she thinks it's Christmas morning and it already opening presents. No, I'm not ignoring my kids. I was upstairs changing
Brayden. Why would it take me that long upstairs for her to do all this much damage? Well let me tell you!
Brayden took a shit on my lap and the poop went out the back of his diaper, all over his clothes, all over my white new shirt and all over the couch. The good news is the couch is leather and can easily be cleaned. The bad news is that he gets to take another bath to clean the crap off of him. 3 changes of clothes already and the day isn't through....
Lexie has decided to take the Donkey Kong Bongo game that we have and tie the cords to the bongos in knots around their computer table. When I came downstairs and tried to gently move the bongos to the side so I didn't fall on my face, the bongos were stuck and so I tripped anyways. Of course I'm in a perfect mood so I don't yell or anything. NOT! I screamed at the top of my lungs at her to pick up all of the blocks that are in 100 pieces all over the floor, the ripped up homework courtesy of Lauren and the stupid Happy Meal toy that I'm sure will be broken by the end of the night
Not to mention the cell phone incident. We've been having a glitch with our phones and while on the phone with
Milenko, the phone hangs up. While I try to dial him back, the phone locks up on me. After another 20 seconds of nothing and then the phone reboots, I get so frustrated that I take the damn phone and slam it into the dashboard of the car. The car is fine. I didn't use all my anger to pound the thing into the dash. I went to call
Milenko about 2 minutes and 4 deep breaths later and the screen in broken. The crack in the digital screen means that I can't use the phone now. What do I tell hubby? "
it was working one minute and then the screen died and did this..." Yes, I lied to
Milenko. However, I did tell him the truth after he went to the phone store and got it replaced for free. He understands since it makes it more believable and he isn't lying to the guy at the store - I'm just not giving him all the information he needs.
Why doesn't a mom tell someone they're on Zoloft? Because when they forget to take it for a week, everyone KNOWS!!! Besides, trying to present yourself as the pretty, nicely dress, clean smelling, happy mom is much nicer than the one in sweats with their hair in a clip with no make-up, zits,
un-brushed teeth and baby shit on their pants.
Well I better run now.
Milenko will be home any minute and will be completely pissed off because I didn't make anything for dinner.
Brayden should wake up and want to either be changed again or want me to hold him for another 2 hours straight. Lauren's sitting on the stairs saying "
Nah, ca-ca, pooh-pooh" which means I'll be in shit up to my elbows in a few minutes. Oh yeah, I have to help Bella do her homework that's due tomorrow and go to the store to get healthy snacks and fruit for her class party tomorrow.
Here are some pictures I uploaded a while ago - just to show you that in my insanity, I do have some cute kids. :)
SIGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lauren has a new place to watch her show - Teletubbies. Every single morning she comes into my room with the channel changer and says "Dubby Dubby Mommy." Translation: "Get your butt downstairs and put Teletubbies on."
Bella has now surpassed the oldest gamers in the house (Milenko & I). She is now almost to the PRO level in Wii Boxing. Who ever thought that during the cold, rainy months that video games were a way to get exercise. I kid you not, Donna & I tried the Wii Boxing and our arms were so sore the next day. Talk about a great workout. Just wait until Dance, Dance Revolution comes out - we might have a decent looking body after all. (okay, maybe not - wishful thinking though!)
Why doesn't a mom tell someone they're on Zoloft? Because when they forget to take it for a week, everyone KNOWS!!! Besides, trying to present yourself as the pretty, nicely dress, clean smelling, happy mom is much nicer than the one in sweats with their hair in a clip with no make-up, zits, un-brushed teeth and baby shit on their pants.
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